Jehovah’s Witnesses Are Not Allowed to Forgive Freely.

In the following music video featured as part of the October 2020 JW Broadcast, Jehovah’s Witnesses are encouraged to not hold a grudge but forgive one another freely. It is based on what is written in Colossians 3:13.

(Colossians 3:13) Continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely even if anyone has a cause for complaint against another. Just as Jehovah freely forgave you, you must also do the same.

However, as the dramatization unfolds we are able to learn that the circumstance chosen by the society is that of a daughter that is hesitant to forgive her disfellowshiped mother after she has been reinstated. It is unclear what the reason was that resulted in the mother being disfellowshipped as there is no portrayal of wrongdoing. The video depicts an argument between what appears to be the mother and her husband with the mother walking away and leaving the family, causing the daughter distress. For all we know it could have been a situation involving separation or divorce. Later there is a scene depicting the congregation welcoming back the mother with hugs but the daughter refuses to greet her. Hence, the daughter is depicted as being unforgiving.

It is important to point out however, that it is the policy of the Watchtower society that congregation members are to shun a disfellowshiped person until the elders meet with them and an official announcement is made to the congregation. Until then it would be inappropriate for anyone, even a family member, to demonstrate any forgiveness.

“WHEN SOMEONE IS DISFELLOWSHIPPED

¹⁹ In a loving family, each member does his part to make the others happy. But imagine that one person rebels. Everybody in the family tries again and again to help him, but he rejects the help. He may decide to leave home, or the head of the family may have to ask him to leave. Something similar can happen in the congregation. A person may choose to keep doing things that displease Jehovah and harm the congregation. He rejects help and shows by his actions that he no longer wants to be part of the congregation. He may choose to leave the congregation himself, or he may have to be disfellowshipped. If this happens, the Bible clearly says that we should “stop keeping company” with him. (Read 1 Corinthians 5:11-13; 2 John 9-11) This can be very difficult if he is a friend of ours or a member of our family. But in a situation like this, our loyalty to Jehovah must be stronger than our loyalty to anyone else.—See Endnote 8.

²⁰ The disfellowshipping arrangement is a loving provision from Jehovah. It keeps the congregation safe from those who do not care about Jehovah’s standards. (1 Corinthians 5:7; Hebrews 12:15, 16) It helps us to show love for Jehovah’s holy name, for his high standards, and for Jehovah himself. (1 Peter 1:15, 16) And the disfellowshipping arrangement shows love for the person who is no longer a member of the congregation. This strong discipline may help him to realize that what he is doing is wrong and motivate him to change. Many who were once disfellowshipped later returned to Jehovah and were warmly welcomed back into the congregation.—Hebrews 12:11.” (Remain in God’s Love pg. 39 par. 19-20 see also endnote on pg. 241)

Willful, continued, unnecessary association with disfellowshipped or
disassociated nonrelatives despite repeated counsel would warrant judicial action.—Matt. 18:17b; 1 Cor. 5:11, 13; 2 John 10, 11; lvs pp. 39-40. (Shepherd the Flock of God ch. 17)

‘But what if he seems to be repentant and needs encouragement?’ someone might wonder. There is a provision for handling such situations. The overseers in the congregation serve as spiritual shepherds and protectors of the flock. (Heb. 13:17; 1 Pet. 5:2) If a disfellowshiped or disassociated person inquires, or gives evidence of wanting to come back into God’s favor, the elders can speak to him. They will kindly explain what he needs to do and might give him some appropriate admonition. They can deal with him on the basis of facts about his past sin and his attitude. Others in the congregation lack such information. So if someone felt that the disfellowshiped or disassociated person ‘is repentant,’ might that be a judgment based on impression rather than accurate information? If the overseers were convinced that the person was repentant and was producing the fruits of repentance, he would be reinstated into the congregation. After that occurs, the rest of the congregation can warmly welcome him at the meetings, display forgiveness, comfort him and confirm their love for him, as Paul urged the Corinthians to do with the man reinstated at Corinth.—2 Cor. 2:5-8. (The Watchtower September 15, 1981 pg. 25 par. 24)

But are we to understand from 1 Corinthians that the elders of the congregation are the only ones that can determine whether an offender is repentant? Paul’s letter was not addressed to the elders but to the entire congregation. There could be no possible reason for individuals in the congregation that had been sinned against not to be aware of the sin and the person’s attitude towards it. Furthermore, where does he say that there should be a sufficient period of time that should pass by during which no one should say even a greeting to him? That the offender must request in writing to be reinstated? That an official announcement should be made before forgiveness by members of the congregation can be extended? One would think the word free implies no limitations. How can this possibly be described as forgiving one another freely?   On the contrary, it is a misuse of scripture to even suggest that such an arrangement is loving and is supported by the Bible. What the society has done is to create a situation where obedience and loyalty to a man-made institution takes priority over obedience to Christ. Just like in Jesus’ illustration of the prodigal son, Paul’s encouragement to the congregation in Colossae to forgive one another freely means that, rather than employing the withholding of forgiveness as a means to manipulate behavior, that they should forgive, and do so from the heart not because they have finally been given permission from some ecclesiastical authority. (Matt. 18:21,22)

What does the Bible really teach about excommunication or disfellowshipping? When did the Watchtower society’s policy of disfellowshipping begin? How should a disfellowshipped one be treated? These and other questions will be answered in future articles.